Revelations?

Soo.. I'm sleeping last night, and the phone starts ringing. At first I was just going to ignore it, but it was 2:30AM, and I figured whoever the hell it was better be calling for a good reason. I answer, and it was D.

He asks me if I was sleeping. Um, yeah. I said, "Why? Are you ok?" He tells me he just wanted to say sorry. I ask for what. He says for everything he's ever done to me, and he feels like he didn't do me right in our relationship. At that point I'm kinda like... speechless, but also curious what brought all this on. He also says he's sorry for putting his hands on me, and not to let any man put his hands on me, and that he would never do it again.

Now mind you, he has had a new girlfriend. He told me a few days ago that she was on some "bullshit", and he didn't think they were going to be together anymore. Then calls me the next day to let me know that "they" were going to come up here so he could see Amaya, but "they" didn't have any money. I asked who is they, and he says his "girl"... sooo I assume they had got back together?? But somewhere in the conversation last night he informs me that he CHOKED her, because he wanted to use the car to go get some weed, and I supposed she told him no. He then tells me he wants to get help because he thinks he has a problem with controlling his temper, and I agreed.

He also admits to me many things I have accused him of in the past, I was right about. Ooohh and the girl that just left him, he met her a week after he went back to Michigan (he graduated college), and cheated on me with her.. and has been with her ever since. I wondered why I wasn't mad about all the things he admitted to me, then I realized I always knew in it the back of my mind... he just never confirmed it. It's nice to finally get closure to it all though.

He continued with some shit about he misses little things we used to do together, and he used to love coming home to me.. and blah blah. I told him that I wish he would have felt this way because it's sincere, not because he's missing someone else. He says he's been feeling this way for a while, but funny how he doesn't mention it until he's all fucked up in the head because this girl left him.

Oooh, and now he wants me and Amaya to come down there for a week, so he can spend time with her. I'm debating about it, because I don't even want to take the chance of re-hashing any old feelings because I'm vulnerable, and he is too. I've come so far mentally when it comes to him, there is no way in hell I can just let it all be for nothing. I wasn't worth making it work before, when I was pregnant and needed you the most, so don't want me now. But for the sake of her spending time with him, I might... I believe I can be strong and stick to what I know in my head is the right thing to do.

*sigh* That's my baby daddy, huh...